New Years Resolutions

A new year is coming up and I guess I should write out what my resolutions are. I admit, I don't often keep up my resolutions, mainly because I don't remember what most of them are, hence I'm creating this blog to help make sure I stay on track with my resolutions.

Resolutions for 2009:

• LOSE WEIGHT*** - This one is a must for me. I have gained SO much weight ever since I stepped into college that I'm not so proud to admit it. I was decent the summer entering my first year in college weighing about 130ish and I didn't look too bad ... now ... I gained about ... 40 pounds ... yeah I know, I totally blew up! The boyfriend and I are gonna diet together to see who looks hotter by the time summer starts ;]
• STOP PROCRASTINATING -ugh, I know I kept telling myself this over and over again but I need to stop procrastinating.
  
• GET MY FINANCIAL AID BACK - meaning I need to do well in school and stop PROCRASTINATING and get my act together.
• GET A JOB - as much as I hate working while in school, I need the money. Can't always rely on the parentals to help out.
• BE A BETTER GF - Boyfriend deserves better. I'm too insecure about myself and too scarred from my past relationships.
• SNOWBOARDING - I wanna try it! =]
• FIND OUT WHO I AM - I don't really know who I am or what I want to do in life. I'm not so happy with how things are right now and I guess I just want them to change.
• CHANGE MAJORS - So far I'm looking into poli sci but I'm taking an etymology class and well ... we'll see how that goes ... nothing has stuck to me yet ...
• PARTY! - Don't judge! I haven't even partied as much ever since I entered college, mainly because it doesnt seem to fit me and I'm always the DD.
• NO MORE TIME BOMB - I gotta find a way to open up to people so I won't explode.

Well, at the moment I can't really come up with anything else ... but I will go back and edit from time to time =]

<3 Sandi

!@#$%^

I have officially lost my sanity.

Make-Up!

Christmas Wish List:
- Gift Cards from the following places
- Sephora
- M.A.C.
- Victoria's Secret
- Starbucks
- Any clothing store I guess
- Donations to the "Help-Sandi-Pay-For-College" fund =]

Usually I'm not so feminine when it comes to beauty stuff and whatnot but I have developed an interest for eye shadow! I don't know why but this interest started over the summer when I purchased my first few Sephora make-up and started blending the eye shadows and whatnot. Then today I came upon my Ate LiZa's blog and that led to another blog from fafinettex3 which contains youtube videos of make up tutorials! That's when I fell in love with eye makeup! Ahhh!

These items and many more can be found at
cherryculture.com

Keep in mind most of the items I bought were under $5! My eye shadow collection has begun! Of course I'm going to start off small now since I can't afford it but once I get a job, I'll most likely be dedicating my pay checks in buying make-up ... well only a certain amount ofmoney of course ... I think as far as my collection go, after this little shopping spree I will be holding off the make-up shopping now since I have a credit card bill to pay off as well as save up money for college!

Besides the make-up splurge, I have come to the conclusion that I have a sleeping order since I cannot sleep nowadays. Well not til 5-6am ... it sucks so bad! Ugh! I'm trying my best to sleep but it's just not clicking ... well I think I'm gonna go watch some more make-up videos before I try to sleep. Peace!

Headache

I currently have a mean headache and it's killing me. I just took 2 Advils and I don't know if it's working or not. I'm stressing so much! Ugh.

Just a Few More ...

Summer has not turned out how I expected it to be. Before summer break started, I had plans spending the summer with more people and hopefully getting to bond with people from high school. Unfortunately for me, I did not have that luxury. Towards the beginning of summer, I was told that my financial aid would not be continued for my 2nd year at UCR. I was devastated when I found out and I was freaking out a bit. To cope with the situation I decided to ask for more hours at work. I was working at Robeks again since I knew they would be lenient with the hours and I was sure they would end up giving me as many hours as I asked for. I was working so much that I didn't have time for anyone. Not for me, not for my best friend [at that time], not my boyfriend, and most importantly my family. My "best-friend" was mad that I was not able to spend time with her so she decided to give me an ultimatum. This hurt me. For her to give me an ultimatum when I didn't deserve it. I was working trying to get my life started, least she can do is understand and not complain. It was still the beginning of summer and she was still freaking out about spending time together. All of the complaining and nagging just made me sick of it. I know it made me a bad friend once I just didn't want to hang out anymore. Hookah nights were getting old. It seemed like every time we would go out, I had to spend some amount of money. I was tired of it. I didn't want any of it. I decided to cut myself off from the world. That way I would try to balance out my life. My [ex] best friend got really hurt about it [i wouldnt blame her] but at the moment, I didn't really care. She can say all she can about how I'm like her ex or whatever, but I have never been so relieved. [ I know, it sounds messed up] I like not having to worry about making time for HER. I swear, it seemed like everything was about her. WHATEVER.

Anyways, moving on. Working at Robeks again was a different experience than last summer. Different rules and different people. I have definitely grew close with my co-workers for they were basically my second family. I also met some new people around the area as well =] Yes there were times were I was so tired of working but I could not wait to leave but once my time was over, I was a bit sad. It would be ages before I get to see all these people. I have grown close to them and I was sad to leave all the trainees. Plus, I'm gonna miss all my discounts =/

I loved being able to spend time with my family. I mean when my family from up North came down, I was so freaking excited. I asked for the entire weekend off just to spend it with them! Family is most definitely number one! =] It was awesome seeing my baby nephew! He's growing up so fast! Spending time with my brothers is priceless as well. I mean yes we argue and whatnot but I'm all they have so I gotta cherish all the time I have with them until I move back to UCR.

My relationship with Carlos has been rocky throughout this summer but everything will be okay tomorrow. Tomorrow is when I will get to be in his arms without any limits =]

Tomorrow will be the day when I move back to Riverside and I cannot wait. Hawthorne is my home but Riverside is my little slice of paradise <3

One More

Literally one more month from now and I'll be moving to Riverside. One month until I move into my new apartment with Carlos and Shawn. Just one more month of working at Robeks, dealing with stupid people, making freaking smoothies, and dealing with all their crap. One more month until I get to fall asleep into the arms of my love and not have to worry about anything but school and living the "college" life. One more is so little, yet so far away. I'm counting down the days until I get to move out of Hawthorne and back to Riverside. A year ago I thought I would end up missing the big city, I thought I would get homesick and miss everyone. This summer has made me realize that I am tired of the big city. Riverside may be in the middle of nowhere and is practically desert, but it's a nice place away from home. There's nothing bothering you in Riverside. It's just you. I love it over there. I have so much freedom. I'm free to do whatever I want. It seems like there's so much stress back at home. It's as if every time I come home, I'm obligated to do something I don't want to do. I know that once I come home to visit once I move to Riverside, I would have to somehow find time to spend it with my family and friends [ well with whatever friends I have left in Hawthorne ] Gahhh I'm so tired right now ... It's almost 3am and I can't sleep ... damn brother and his damn games ... grrr!

This summer has been a difficult summer. Everyone has changed ... even me ... I have become anti-social and surprisingly, I'm okay with that. I just need some time to myself where I can relax and plan my life out. I just recently lost my best friend ... yes, I feel bad ... but I just didn't find it to be fair that she gave me an ultimatum ... I didn't deserve one ... but w/e ...

Family is the main thing in my life during the summer. I rarely see them so I rather spend time with them more than with anyone else.

Work stinks. People are stupid.

Carlos is awesome. Even though we've had many arguments throughout this summer, I dont know how, but he manages to stick by my side. Gosh, I love that boy =]

Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ... I'm tired. Peace!